“The Hidden Denial Behind What We Desire: How to Unlock True Freedom”
We all desire something in life, whether it’s success, love, happiness, or fulfillment. But have you ever stopped to think about what lies behind those desires? What if I told you that underneath every longing, there is an underlying force of denial—denial that we may not even be aware of?
It may sound strange, but when we dig deep into our desires, we often uncover something uncomfortable: fear, lack, and the feeling of not being enough. These emotions shape how we pursue what we want in life. We chase our dreams, but unknowingly, we are also rejecting parts of ourselves along the way.
The universe works in mysterious ways. What we deny—whether it’s a feeling, a person, or a part of our identity—often comes back to us, sometimes in unexpected forms. This denial keeps us stuck, trapped in cycles of disappointment and frustration. But when we begin to accept all parts of ourselves, including the things we reject, we open the door to true freedom.
What is Denial?
The word “denial” encompasses the rejection or avoidance of certain feelings, thoughts, or aspects of ourselves. It often stems from fears, anxieties, or past traumas that we carry with us unconsciously. Denial is an emotional force that prevents us from fully experiencing and embracing the desires we so deeply yearn for.
For example, you may desire love, success, or fulfillment. But within, you might also feel that you are not deserving of those things, or that you are incapable of achieving them. These conflicting feelings—desire on one hand, denial on the other—create an internal struggle, making it difficult for us to manifest the very things we seek.
When we remain unaware of this denial, we struggle to achieve our desires. We may find ourselves chasing goals only to feel constantly blocked, as if something invisible is holding us back. The real issue is not the external world, but the internal conflict between what we want and the hidden beliefs we hold that prevent us from obtaining them.
Accepting Denial as the First Step Toward Freedom
So how do we break free from this denial? How can we overcome the barriers that are holding us back from achieving our desires?
The first step is acknowledging and accepting the feelings of denial within us. Many of us unconsciously suppress our uncomfortable emotions—fear, sadness, anger, and insecurity—hoping that they will simply go away. But the more we try to avoid them, the more powerful they become, affecting our lives in ways we don’t realize.
Acceptance doesn’t mean you approve of or love these negative feelings, but it means recognizing and allowing them to exist. When we stop denying our feelings, we begin to release the hold they have over us. By accepting what we fear or reject, we unlock the door to true freedom. This is the moment we start to release the weight of denial that keeps us trapped in cycles of pain.
The Only Thing That Can Hurt You Is Your Own Thoughts
You may have experienced moments when you felt hurt by others—criticism, rejection, or misunderstandings. However, the reality is that we are rarely hurt by others directly. Instead, we are hurt by the way we interpret and respond to external events.
Take a moment to reflect on your life. How often have you felt that someone or something has hurt you, only to realize that it was your reaction to their words or actions that caused the pain? Our thoughts, our beliefs, and our judgments about people and situations are what give them power over us. When we reject something—whether it’s a person, an event, or a feeling—we unknowingly give it power to hurt us.
The key to liberating ourselves from this cycle is to shift how we react to the world around us. Instead of rejecting certain experiences or people, we can choose to accept them. When we stop labeling things as “good” or “bad,” “right” or “wrong,” we stop giving them the power to hurt us.
Imagine living a life where you are not constantly battling your inner demons or avoiding uncomfortable situations. What if you could simply allow things to happen as they are, accepting them without fear or judgment? This is where true freedom begins.
How to Free Yourself from External Denial
Understanding that our own thoughts are what truly hurt us is the first step. But how can we begin to break free from these thought patterns and free ourselves from external denial?
One powerful practice is self-acceptance. Self-acceptance means acknowledging and loving every part of who you are. It means accepting not just your strengths, but also your flaws, fears, and vulnerabilities. We often try to hide or deny parts of ourselves that we deem “undesirable,” but this only creates more internal conflict. True peace comes when we stop running from our imperfections and accept ourselves fully as we are.
When you practice self-acceptance, you stop trying to avoid or deny the things you fear. Instead, you embrace them. This doesn’t mean you have to love every part of yourself immediately, but it does mean that you stop resisting it. You recognize that everything within you is a part of your journey and that each part has its own role in shaping who you are.
True Freedom: What Does It Look Like?
True freedom is not the absence of external challenges, but the ability to remain unaffected by them. When we free ourselves from denial, we stop giving power to outside circumstances, opinions, or people. We stop reacting from a place of fear, judgment, or insecurity. Instead, we respond with acceptance, understanding, and compassion.
True freedom is also the ability to desire what we truly want without the fear of rejection or inadequacy. It’s no longer about chasing external achievements or validation; it’s about aligning with your true self and recognizing that everything you need is already within you. The moment you stop rejecting yourself, you begin to attract the life and the desires that are in alignment with your true nature.
Conclusion
The hidden denial behind what we desire can be the key to unlocking true freedom. By acknowledging and accepting the feelings we have denied, we set ourselves free from the limitations we’ve imposed on ourselves. When we stop rejecting parts of ourselves, we stop giving power to external forces that no longer need to control us. We become the masters of our own lives.
As you reflect on your desires, take a moment to look within. What parts of yourself have you been denying? What beliefs or fears are holding you back? By accepting these parts of yourself, you will find that your desires will naturally align with your true essence, and you will begin to experience the freedom that you’ve always sought.
Remember, the key to true freedom lies not in what you seek outside, but in what you are willing to accept within.