[Buddha's Teachings] Liberation from the Desire for Approval! The Path to True Freedom According to Buddha
Everyone, do you ever find yourself caring too much about others' opinions in your daily life? Modern society is filled with endless information, making it easy to feel trapped by others' views and judgments. Especially on social media, the number of "likes" or followers can seem to define your worth. But can you truly say that you're living your own life if you're constantly seeking others' approval? Buddha’s teachings offer a path to liberate oneself from these invisible chains and attain true freedom. Today, let’s explore this together.
The story begins in a small merchant’s home in ancient India. The main character, named Ravin, was raised with high expectations from those around him—to grow into a successful merchant. Meeting others' expectations became his life’s purpose, and he worked tirelessly to gain their approval. To him, others' acknowledgment was his source of self-worth and a sign of success.
Ravin’s store was popular in town, with many customers visiting daily. He felt fulfilled seeing his business thrive through hard work, but deep inside, he was always uneasy. This anxiety stemmed from comparing himself to more successful merchants and wealthy individuals. Nearby was another merchant, Nanda, who was older and more experienced. Nanda’s successful business created enormous pressure on Ravin.
One day, Ravin heard that Nanda had just completed a significant transaction. Consumed by jealousy and impatience, he thought, "If only I could land deals like that…" but couldn’t ignore the feeling that he was living according to others' judgments. That evening, feeling unsettled, he pondered alone.
Ravin longed for the assurance and self-worth that came from others' approval, yet his failure to achieve this constantly filled him with anxiety. Around this time, he heard rumors of a monk in town who offered “teachings for inner peace.” Ravin felt drawn to these teachings.
The next day, he visited the temple where the monk resided. Upon arrival, the monk greeted him warmly with a gentle smile. Ravin poured out his troubles to the monk, saying, “I constantly compare myself to others, yearning for approval, but it fills me with impatience and anxiety. How can I find peace in my heart?”
The monk listened quietly and replied, “The anxiety and impatience you feel arise from comparing yourself to others. You’re measuring your own worth based on others' lives. But in doing so, you’re losing sight of your true self.”
Ravin was taken aback by the monk’s words, realizing that he had always measured his success by others' opinions. The monk continued, “Observe your mind and watch the emotions that arise within you. By observing how jealousy and anxiety come and go, you’ll learn to confront yourself without being overwhelmed by these feelings.”
Inspired, Ravin began observing his mind. Although challenging at first, he gradually managed to watch the emotions of jealousy and anxiety as they surfaced. In time, he was able to focus on his business without being swayed by emotions.
A few weeks later, Ravin found himself unaffected by others' achievements. He discovered a new joy in engaging with customers sincerely and operating his business at his own pace. One day, a young merchant visited him, asking for advice on success.
With a smile, Ravin replied, “I used to constantly compare myself to others, feeling anxious and jealous. But real success comes from discovering your own worth, not from comparison.” The young merchant listened intently, nodding in agreement.
As the story comes to an end, Ravin visits the temple once more to express his gratitude to the monk. “Thanks to your teachings, I’ve been able to free myself from others’ judgment and live a life of true fulfillment.” The monk nodded gently, saying, “Remember to continue facing yourself each day and never stop growing.”
This story holds many insights for us in the modern world. We often feel trapped by others' evaluations, unknowingly losing sight of our true worth. But what truly matters is to find value within ourselves and live our own lives without comparing ourselves to others.
In our daily lives, let’s ask ourselves: “Am I living by comparison? Am I bound by others' judgments? Am I truly living my life?” Reflecting on these questions will help us rediscover our true selves.
Just as Ravin learned, by liberating ourselves from the desire for approval and listening to our inner voice, we may find true freedom. This realization isn’t achieved in a single moment but deepens through daily practice. By observing our minds and embracing new challenges, we gradually find the true meaning of living our own lives.
Thank you for reading. Today, we discussed how liberating ourselves from the need for approval allows us to live our own lives. I hope you gained some insights to help you feel balanced and move forward positively. Please like and subscribe, and stay tuned for the next post.
